Oracles Gone 'Wild'
First it was the oracle octopus... Countered with lemurs, camels and giraffes... This is ridiculous!
Cephalopods are pretty intelligent. An octopus can even open a screw top bottle by itself. But to call it psychic at first was just cute... NOT something anyone should have taken seriously! It was all a lark I suppose. (No, no not the bird!) But the moment poor Paul started getting 'death through grilling' threats, it has all gone to the dogs (No, not real ones!).
I mean come on! It is evident the poor thing doesn't know (and frankly doesn't care) about who wins a lousy football match! Paul was probably attracted more by the coat of arms on the Spanish flag than the plain ol' German tricolor... or the Dutch one. Who knows!
The oracle wars seem to have taken a ridiculous turn with a Dutch zoo doing a counter prediction. They showed a lemur an orange and a red chili pepper, and the animal happily chose the orange. Who in their right mind would have chosen a spicy chili pepper anyway?! (Trivia - There's actually a species called Holland's Sportive Lemur)
And since a sweet toothed simian (forgive my zoologically inaccurate play on words) is not enough, they decided to test the psychic abilities of camels too! This time a carrot replaced the orange. Big difference!
And since a camel's head is not high enough to catch all those psychic vibes from Holland fans... the zookeepers even got a giraffe into the act. A tomato replaced the chili pepper (presumably a giraffe running around breathing fire is not good for zoo business). OF COURSE, it chose carrots!!!
Well, I can still forgive the Dutch for getting all weird about Paul. God knows the Germans and the English were! (A friend told me some English pubs didn't screen the Germany-Argentina match, after England lost the previous one as Paul predicted.) But now a parakeet has got in on the oracle act too! No, it's not called Predictably Polly or anything... It's called Mani and it stays in far off Singapore, which doesn't even have a football team in the World Cup! Wonder if someone fed it a red hot chili pepper (parakeets like that kind of thing), because it did pick Spain!
There's an Australian crocodile that's backing Paul too... How did Harry do that? He ate a chicken dangling under a Spanish flag! Really!
Speaking of chicks...I've read that there are two soccer crazy chicks (the human female variety) from China, who have looked into the glass ball (well, actually used I-Ching) to predict the result. That kind of gives me a bit of comfort. Notwithstanding the dumb animals, there are still many crazy humans about.
Anyways, just one day to go for the final, and I for one am quite tired of all this! Orange or salsa... I really don't care as long as the victory, whosoever, is sweet (or 'Aaaargh! my tongue is on fire' hot). But one thing I am certain... World Cup mania certainly has gone 'wild'!
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