Advani, The Outsider and Aamir

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Shri LK Advani was making a sad spectacle of himself, indulging in taking personal pot-shots at the fast-recuperating PM Manmohan Singh, terming him as a timid weakling, even as Narendra Modi, much inspired, launched his own sharp volley of typical derogatory.

For a veteran leader who has perennially planned an ambitious restful night at 7, Race Course Road, it was sheer self-mockery where the BJP supremo was concerned.

Advani has had a deep pathological disrespect for Manmohan Singh, and this is not just evident because of the expected mud-slinging during election time. Even at the time of the nuclear debate and other issues, the 0.5 kg dumb-bell lifting marathon man could only think of accusing Manmohan of being a pulpy softie, being guardedly observed by Mrs Sonia Gandhi. But the true reason why Advani loathes Singhji is because in the deadly inner club of the political class, it is considered almost blasphemous to have a successful bureaucrat, non-political, Rajya Sabha member, utterly unassuming and totally devoid of political machinations, be the Prime Minister.

Worse, Manmohan Singh has turned out to be a canny survivor with a creditable track-record; Advani is understandably hurting.

For Advani that is sheer sacrilege. LKA believes, like a good "old school"-boy of 82 years, that the real throne must be occupied by a hard-core, intrinsic political sort, no matter how deviously cunning, egregiously corrupt or totally asinine he may be. For him, even his most cherished CPM rival Prakash Karat, a seasoned politician, is a better bet than the rank "outsider" Singh.

It is the same problem that afflicts a certain slight man with a calculated smile, suffering from massive delusions of self-importance; actor Aamir Khan.

Aamir Khan is like Advani, similarly obsessed with a rank "outsider" in Shah Rukh Khan who has dominated tinsel-town with inexorable strangle-hold for over 15 years. For Aamir that is an inexcusable intransigence, and he vents his frustration like a petulant "puppy" (the pun on the famous "dog comment" is blatantly deliberate, folks) denied his juicy bone.

It is a human condition that certain occupations develop incestuous co-habitation for survival, no matter how much they privately find each other as repugnant as a lizard's tail in a blue lagoon cocktail; media, bankers, models, Bollywood and politics, amongst some illustrious ones.

The truth is that it was Aamir who indulged in the most pedestrian "joke" about a national icon and fellow colleague by referring to him as a "dog" in his now-defunct blog. In my opinion, that was not just low-cut, it was downright scurvy.

Ever since, he seems to take a sadistic delight in playing below-the-belt stuff, even as he blames the cigarette-puffing SRK for his cocky arrogance.

But Khan's real indignation is about how a lonely struggling Dilliwallah stormed Bollywood and became it's undisputed ruler with a resounding territorial conquest, while despite his huge kinship and entrenched props in his own turf, Aamir Khan himself got forced into nebulous oblivion. His recent media-savvy excursions are a ham-handed effort to reclaim the throne that he think is an insider's birth-right, not an outsider's prerogative to capture. That's why the massive sulk. That's why, like Advani, there is an occasional display of shocking condescension for the "other" guy.

But life is ironical. Isn't it rather strange that in the daily maddening scramble in the April heat and dust-storm of Indian elections, all the PM hopefuls (and they are so many the laundry-list dries up my ink), Sharad Pawar, Lalu Prasad, Mr Gowda the Great, Mayawati, Ram Vilas Paswan, Naveen Patnaik, Advani et al are busy attempting every ruse, diabolical trap, and cloak and dagger games to somehow scramble to achieve a life-long ambition, while the modest, sincere Sardar is in London, representing India in the G-20 Summit, with perhaps the best personal knowledge about the current financial crisis in that elite lot of high-profile statesmen?

As someone once said---It's destiny. Danny Boyle will agree. I don't know about Aamir and Advani though.