Realisations on a picnic trail

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Last week, the school announced that they would be taking the little toddlers for a picnic to Joggers Park in Bandra. This one announcement evoked quite a few reactions within the parents.

Some were excited, some thought it was too far, some exclaimed it will be very hot and sunny, some inquired if they could accompany their children and some plainly decided they will not send their kids.

I was analysing my own feelings. What was the perfect thing to feel? Honestly, I was very excited but a little nervous. Excited because I know how happy my daughter is in the park. She loves the outdoors, the swing, the waterfall, the trees, birds and natural surroundings.

Nervous as this was her first outdoor trip beyond the school walls without me as well as her first ride in the school bus. A parent asked me if I would accompany her and I plainly said no.

If I went I was dead sure my daughter wouldn't leave my lap and I really wanted her to mingle with her friends and have fun.

Back home I seriously toyed with the idea of accompanying her. And I trashed it. It was high time I let go. For two and a half years, I have held her too close to my chest buffering her from every fall, tumble and uncertainty. She needed to grow and fall and learn to rise again. How long could I be her knight in shining armour?

This is easier said than done though. All of a parent's life goes in deciding which is the right time to let go. The first time she walks without holding your finger, the time you leave her to ride her bicycle by herself, the time you leave her at a neighbour's place, the time you put her in school, the time she uses the Internet without your supervision and the time she leaves for further studies.

At every step a parent is debating whether the time is right, how will she manage, have you taught her enough, what if something untoward happens. The questions plague you like an irritating cold and it is left to you to find the answers.

But you do eventually. You do find the answers. Sometimes out of choice, sometimes out of force. Sometimes your child gives you the answers. No matter in what way but the answers do come and thank God for that. In the picnic's case, long after I decided I wouldn't accompany her, the teachers announced that the parents can't go with the kids. The ones wanting to go were disappointed, the ones like me who had given up the idea were happy at the reiteration.

And sure enough, my daughter managed and quite well. She had fun, came back smiling and wanted to go again the next day. All I pray is that each time I let go of her she comes back smiling to me, a little more enriched by life's experiences. For each time I let go, it feels like the toughest examination and each time she manages well I pass the exam with flying colours.

Till my next post! You can write to me at http://mammamania.in