Talking Dirty

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"I've been masturbating since I was 13... will I be able to satisfy my wife after I'm married?"

"My penis is 2 inches long. Is this because I have been masturbating for the last 6 years?"

"I am 16 years old and my boyfriend is 17. We were kissing... and now I haven't had my period for 2 weeks. Am I pregnant?

Open any newspaper and look at the advice column. If you aren't actually laughing at the questions, you're probably shocked at the kind of misinformation that is doing the rounds...

That's right. For a nation that has one of the highest populations, we Indians know precious little about sex. For a nation that authored the Kamasutra, we just don't know the how and where...and for a nation that needs an act of parliament to give its citizens the right to information... it's hardly surprising.

Yes, this is about sex education being introduced in schools. And this is about introducing topics like masturbation and arousal in class. If you're going to leave me mails and messages telling me I'm a scarlet woman... now is the time to move on to the next blog... because what's happening now is leaving me angry enough to blog. Always difficult when you're naturally as indolent as I am.

Why should certain pertinent topics be dropped from the syllabus? Because teachers are embarrassed? But they're trained to teach... Does your gynecologist blush each time you go to him for a check up? Or does your urologist giggle self-consciously when you lower your pants and climb on to his examination couch? No. Because they are professionals... Like teachers are professionals... trained to teach course curriculum. That is why you HAVE to do a B.Ed. or M.Ed in order to teach.

One teacher I met while gathering reactions was rather bewildered by the fuss. She said she had no trouble handling her co-ed class because that was what she did professionally. She added that this entire brouhaha was giving her students the idea that there was something to ashamed of about masturbation, arousal and contraception.

Is this the idea we want to propagate? That sex is bad? That you need to feel guilty about it? Like I pointed out earlier... for a nation that is grappling with over population, it does seem hypocritical.

Her colleagues agreed. They believed that having a course that was labeled 'SEX EDUCATION" was bound to raise a few hackles. But if the curriculum were to be re-distributed between the other courses and made a natural part of the syllabus of, say, Science or Personality Development, the same subject matter could be covered without raising a fuss. Let the science teacher talk about condoms and contraception while the personality development teacher handles the mating game. The sex- education teacher of course would be out of a job... but at least the moralists are happy and the parents and children relieved.

After all young people around the country... whether in the village or the city... are not going to NOT indulge in either masturbation or sex just because they do know the word for it?

Some of the kids I spoke to, told me how condoms are strewn all across Shivaji Park first got them talking about sex. Since they couldn't approach any adult, they resorted to the Internet and to older friends who were equally clueless but less willing to admit it. You wouldn't believe some of the stuff they think is real!!!! These are the kids who grow up to write letters to a sex columnist. These are the kids at risk of HIV Aids because they don't have any clue about prevention. Our public service messages are equally vague and discreet... which is ironic, now that you think about it. Sex is taboo but Aids is out there.

Or are we such slaves to our 'culture' that we are willing to be wiped out by HIV Aids? Because, even without the added padding, HIV statistics are high enough to raise the crisis alarm. And while we're still arguing about whether or not we should use the word condom in public... the time for talking about HIV Aids is past. What we need now is some action.