Masand's verdict: The Train

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Cast: Emraan Hashmi, Sayali Bhagat, Geeta Basra, Aseem Merchant

Direction: Hasnain Hyderabadwala and Raksha Mistry

Emraan Hashmi’s is the best performance in this week’s new release The Train so that should pretty much give you an idea about what the film is like.

The Train, incidentally, is an unapologetic, shameless rip-off of the Clive Owen-Jennifer Aniston thriller Derailed, and this desi version’s been directed by Hasnain Hyderabadwala and Raksha Mistry who last plagarised the Tom Cruise starrer Collateral to give us The Killer.

Now the thing about The Train is that although it faithfully follows the blueprint of the original film, it does so lethargically at an almost snail-like pace, killing you slowly with its misplaced sense of morality.

In a nutshell, the film’s about a married man and the price he must pay for adultery. Emraan Hashmi is the man in question, newcomer Sayali Bhagat his wife, and Geeta Basra the other woman. The story’s set in Bangkok, although till the end of the film I couldn’t figure out why they needed to go outside our very own Filmistan Studio because the directors don’t exploit the city to lend character to the story.

The basic flaw with The Train is its own inability to understand what story it wants to tell. The screenplay plods along wearily and what’s meant to be the big turning point in the plot is so predictable, you’ve guessed it a good forty minutes before you actually see it happen on screen. Then there are those terrifying performances by Aseem Merchant playing the bad guy, and leading lady Geeta Basra – who’s so buried under make-up you can’t even see her expressions. Put it all together and you’ve got a recipe for disaster.

The reason The Train fails and so miserably so is because the filmmakers’ conviction is so clearly missing in the film. You can’t just rip off a Hollywood film frame by frame and expect your film to turn out exactly like the original – no, that’s not going to happen. Look at some successful rip-offs – Murder and Kaante…You’ll notice both of these films had clearly developed characters and a fairly solid screenplay, even if the screenplays weren’t entirely original. The Train sadly has neither, and that’s why it’s such a royal bore.

It’s true what I said in the beginning; Emraan Hashmi isn’t half as bad as he usually is. He’s having a bad hair day and looks a bit like a lost lamb, but that aside, it’s an earnest attempt. Not that it helps actually because the film itself is just very difficult to sit through. I’m going to go with one out of five and a thumbs down for Hasnain Hyderabadwala and Raksha Mistry’s The Train – it’s loose and it’s weak and if you ask me honestly, this train’s going nowhere, so get on at your own risk.

Rating: 1 / 5 (Poor)