India | Updated Jun 29, 2009 at 11:47pm IST

Pride Vs Fear: The grey space for gay people

New Delhi: Meet 35-year-old Sonali Gulati and a 24-year-old media professional. While Sonali has come out of the closet and asserted the fact that she is gay, the 24-year old is in the grey place between 'coming out' and staying firmly in the closet.

Sonali is a filmmaker who is today glad she had the courage to come out some years ago.

"It was a historic event. It's matter of great pride and the great thing is that it was organised by the community," says she of the gay pride parade.

Breaking out of what she calls an upper middle homophobic environment was tough for her, but she found an escape route through her films.

"People ask me why I wear my sexuality on my sleeve, but then I wear it on my sleeve because I can afford to. I have to speak up for people who can't for many other reasons," says she.

While over 700 people celebrated 'queerness' in Delhi - a city that's often considered hostile and closed to the gay community - coming out is still not an option for many people because of family pressures and the social stigma attached to it.

Also present on Sunday at the parade was a 24-year-old media professional from an orthodox Christian family. He chose to remain anonymous in the crowds because he is still living within the closet.

"When people are ignorant about things they tend to be aggressive. Their reactions towards us are often violent. We hear of so many incidents," says he.

But that didn't stop this man from attending the march.

"Even though I am out with my close friends, I don't want to proclaim it to everyone, but I do want to express it in my own way and being part of the march was my way of extending support," says he.

Today Sonali can celebrate the acceptance of the gay movement in India. Maybe next year, the young media professional may find the courage to take off his mask and tell the world who he is.

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